A while back, a fellow blogger asked her readers to share a favorite joke or two, and the result was a pretty entertaining comment section. I had so much fun reading it that I decided to try something similar here. I'll share a few favorites myself, then I welcome your contributions, be they long, short, or anywhere in between. I only stipulate that they must be clean - this is a G-rated site, folks. :)
Short Joke (no, not you, Siobhan):
Two men walked into a bar. The third one ducked.
Medium-Sized Joke:
A woman walked into a podiatrist's office and said, "Doctor, I think I'm a moth."
"A moth?! Ma'am, you need a psychiatrist, not a foot doctor. What on earth are you doing here?"
"Well, the light was on, so I came inside."
Long Joke:
An engineer died and found himself at the pearly gates. When he tried to go inside, St. Peter looked in his book and said, "I'm sorry - I don't see your name on my list. I'm afraid you'll have to go Downstairs."
Well, the engineer hadn't been in Hades very long before he decided he didn't like it much. It was hot and stuffy, and there was nothing to do. So, being an enterprising, mechanical type, he built an air-conditioner, a great sound system, and a flat screen TV that received about 3,000 channels (hey, he had limited resources). Pretty soon, the Inferno was a pretty happenin' place.
One day the Devil got a call from St. Peter. "There's obviously been some mistake - you're not supposed to have any engineers down there. You'd better send him Upstairs immediately."
The Devil snorted. "Are you kidding? I love this guy. There's no way I'm letting him leave."
St. Peter replied, "If you're not willing to observe the law, I'm afraid we'll have to take you to court."
"Yeah, right. And where do YOU expect to find a lawyer?"
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
8 comments:
A man walked into a bar in a Bozeman, Montana and ordered three beers, all at once. He sat in the bar for nearly an hour, first taking a sip from one beer, then the second, and then the third. He said nothing to anyone, though the bartender couldn't help but observe this odd drinking arrangement.
For the next three months, on the last Friday of the month, the man came in an did the same thing. Finally, the bartender had to speak, "You know, friend, they taste better when they are freshly tapped. I could just do one at a time; it's no trouble."
The man explained that he had a brother in Billings and another in Helena. They didn't see each other very often and had agreed that they'd all go to a local bar the last Friday of the month and enjoy a drink this same way with his brothers.
The bartender smiled, thinking that was a nice tradition. Sure enough for several more months the man came into the bar at the end of the month and word of his tradition spread until he became somewhat of a local fixture.
One Friday night the man came in and just ordered two beers. The bartender allowed the man to have his drinks in silence and then said to him, "I'm very sorry for you loss."
"What?" The man was puzzled.
The bartender nodded to the two empty mugs, "Your loss; you are only drinking for two tonight."
The man smiled and waved it off, "Oh, this! Its nothing, really. The wife and I have just joined the Mormon church and I don't drink anymore, but it hasn't affected my brothers in any way."
At least he's internalized the Church's emphasis on family. :)
This post was a fun idea!
But alas, not all great ideas come to fruition, apparently.
Hannah's Favorite Joke:
What did the snail said as he got a ride on the tortoise? WHEEEEE!
Bwahaha . . . I needed that, Nicole. Thank Hannah for me.
There are two chocolate rabbits. One has his ear bit off, and the other has his bum bit off.
the one rabbit says, "My bum hurts!"
The other one says, "Huh?"
Thanks, Holly. :)
Post a Comment